ok parad, think of a blade, sharp at the front, and the side. Meaning they can either slash in any direction, or stab. Now think of a pen. A pens sharp end is the top, meaning the only movement you could do would be a thrust. Making it incredibly predictable, unless you can somehow manage to cut me with the side of the pen. You would be totally predictable, and would get annihalated. Face it man, its a silly idea. Oh yes i just looked up your objects, which all happen to be sharp at all points and specificlly designed with combat in mind.
"They say the only way to kill a lion is with a rear naked choke, but I'd just kick it in the head"