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#410904 - 11/02/08 07:51 AM I got punched in the face
Landus Offline
Member

Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 373
Loc: UK
On Halloween I was walking home with my girlfriend at 1am in costume. Up ahead I saw a 4-6 males and felt the danger alarm ringing a little. I think it was the fact there was a few of them and the speed of which they were walking and the way they carried themselves with this sort of male gang powered ego walk or something. Anyway, as we approached, keeping to a side of them, one broke free and sped up and I realized we would have to walk through. So there's 3 to my left in a line and 1 to my right. One to my left said he'd do something to my girlfriend and then the one to my right punched me in the face. He must have just bought his right hand up and clipped me, we all then kept walking.

It really got to me, I felt weak, foolish and helpless to be honest. The punch itself hurt my feelings more than anything and I believe I let shock overcome me. I'm going to be honest, this is the Internet afterall and I'm not ashamed, but I actually cried. I think this was partly due to my girlfriend not understanding but then again I can't shift blame onto her or anyone else.

It got to me so much, knowing I would probably never see him again, knowing I didn't even look at them enough to see who they were or anything.

My point is that this has changed me for the better. I once thought of myself as somehow capable when-it-comes-to-it but it came to it in a form which I never thought would happen. Simple as that, walk passed, got punched. I let my guard down when it should have been up, I probably should have crossed the road earlier when I felt alarms ringing.


I have cried with shock before once when I fell over, I believe it was shock because it wasn't particularly painful.

I would like some advice on what's best to do in the future, and I would also like advice on how to deal with shock reactions. Thank you

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#410905 - 11/02/08 08:54 AM Re: I got punched in the face [Re: Landus]
Ket Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 11/18/04
Posts: 612
Loc: TX
I, first of all, admire your candor. Not alotta people out there who could admit to that.

As to your question ...In my experience, the only real way you can get used to "Shock Experiences", as you say, is by having them happen more often. Not really something you can necessarily emulate while sparring or anything. It doesn't make you weak, but it may make you foolish for not listening to the warning bells in your head and crossing the street. But, on second thought, some folks would feed off that kind of hesitancy on your part, especially when it has to do with Group of guys like that. They could have advanced. So in retrospect, there MAY not have been anything you could have done about it. I'm sure other people will have something to say about that, though.

Keep yer head up, keep training, and refrain from walking late at night with your girlfriend in that neighborhood. Or period.
_________________________
Regards, -Ket "Life is a myriad of probabilities. Living is a plethora of possibility."

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#410906 - 11/02/08 10:43 AM Re: I got punched in the face [Re: Landus]
fileboy2002 Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 11/13/05
Posts: 999
Loc: Chicago, IL
Welcome to one of the hard truths about real world self-defense: people who attack you are most likely to do so when they have an overwhelming advantage, in your case, numbers. Their purpose was to humiliate and thus make themselves feel important. You've got nothing to be ashamed of. Had you acted differently, you and your girlfriend would have been beaten senseless by this mob of human trash.

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#410907 - 11/02/08 11:30 AM Re: I got punched in the face [Re: fileboy2002]
skinters Offline
Member

Registered: 05/25/08
Posts: 239
Loc: swansea,wales
landus

think you feel a lot more shame with you girl being there aswell,but time heals these things,and will make you stronger.ive had soemthing like this happen to me,you never forget it but use it,so next time you can handle it in a way that dont affect you so hard.remember what they done was nothing personal, but beacause you have taken it personal,it has affected you more. they scum and you not the first person they did this to,and certaintly wont be the last.

after reading what happened to you it reminded me of this http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=ySNWVBDutaI&feature=related

two bits o scum attack this guys girl a lot like you discribe,and although its debatable if the way this guy reacts is something you would merit when faced with multiple attackers its still amazing to watch .
_________________________
if only we could strike with the eyes - from the thought to the fist how much time is lost ?

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#410908 - 11/02/08 12:37 PM Re: I got punched in the face [Re: Landus]
duanew Offline
Member

Registered: 06/28/08
Posts: 326
Loc: MN
Landus,
There are lessons that if you survive you can learn alot. This is one of them. A little dose of reality regarding your abilities and perceptions. You'll probably always listen to that listen from now on.
The best thing for a stress reaction is heavy breathing to slow down the heart rate. Later when possible workout to the point of exhaustion to get rid of all the unused stress chemicals.
Your girlfriend probably understands the tears better than you so I wouldn't worry about her thinking less of you.
Tears are a sign of strength not weakness. I learned that from a cop who was blinded by gunfire. It's just your mind and body taking care of itself.
_________________________
Duane

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#410909 - 11/02/08 02:18 PM Re: I got punched in the face [Re: duanew]
trevek Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 05/15/05
Posts: 3337
Loc: Poland
Landus, I have felt similar things myself after being jumped one night. I kept asking what happened to my training, why had I not been able to defend myself, why...

The upshot was that I was being given a second chance at a relatively small price (just a couple of bruises). But yeah, the shock, the feeling of weakness and fear that as someone who'd been trained i still lost in a fight (without giving one).

The tears probably are delayed shocjk and are nothing to be ashamed of.

As some of the others have said, your actions (or what you may feel were 'lack of actions') are probably what saved you and your girlfriend from much worse. Indeed, it was probably your fear/care for your girlfriend which kept you from doing anything physical.

Look on it as a positive learning experience, with a second chance (for a cheap price).

Have you spoken to your girlfriend about it?
_________________________
See how well I block your punches with my jaw!!

Supporting everyone saying "nuts to cancer"

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#410910 - 11/03/08 01:07 AM Re: I got punched in the face [Re: trevek]
Leo_E_49 Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 02/24/05
Posts: 4117
Loc: California
When you get TKOed, crying from the shock is a pretty common reaction, don't worry about it.

I agree that your actions were probably the best you could have taken, given the circumstances.
_________________________
Self Defense
(Website by Marc MacYoung, not me)

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#410911 - 11/03/08 01:29 AM Re: I got punched in the face [Re: Leo_E_49]
dandjurdjevic Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 05/10/08
Posts: 844
Loc: Australia
Landus, had you tried to fight you would have been overwhelmed by numbers. Your girlfriend might have been assaulted. I'm fairly certain that you would have had a lot more to be sorry about than some shock and a bruised ego.

Even if you could have beaten them all up I doubt it would have been a desirable outcome. You'd have engaged in a brawl for no real benefit.

Nor should you be concerned that you should have "taught him a lesson" so that he won't do it again. Firstly, it's not your job to "clean up society": don't ever try to be a vigilante. Secondly (and most imporantly) there are too many idiots out there; trying to "educate" them all is as pointless as swatting mosquitoes at a barbecue. They're out there and they always will be. Avoid them as best you can. Fight when you have no option. Aggression must only be resorted to as a regrettable necessity.

The same kind of thing has happened to me many times. A gang walked past me as I was sitting in a cinema and one of them slapped me hard over the back of the head. Once I was waiting in a queue when a bunch of thugs pushed through - one threw a punch which just caught me on the cheek as I dodged. I never did anything to retaliate and I'm glad I didn't. There was nothing to be gained.

Recently my brother was cycling home when he came upon a gang spraying graffiti. When he asked them what they were doing they pelted him with full beer bottles. Luckily he rode away unscathed, but the bottles narrowly missed him.

There are too many mosquitoes out there my friend.

I suspect that if you were in the same position with the benefit of hindsight you would be well advised to do EXACTLY the same as what you did that night (well - maybe you'd try to dodge/deflect the blow).

There is no shame.
_________________________
http://www.dandjurdjevic.com/

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#410912 - 11/03/08 01:50 AM Re: I got punched in the face [Re: Landus]
BrianS Offline
Higher rank than you
Professional Poster

Registered: 11/04/05
Posts: 5959
Loc: Northwest Arkansas
No shame in what happened at all Landus. Try not to dwell on it too much. Hopefully, these morons will punch the wrong guy one too many times. They are likely to be seriously injured or killed acting this foolishly. Some people do carry and may have shot them. I wonder if idiots like this ever think of the real danger of being stupid.

Try to avoid that kind of scenario next time is the best you can do. You just can't fix stupid!
_________________________
The2nd ammendment, it makes all the others possible. <///<




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#410913 - 11/03/08 01:43 PM Re: I got punched in the face [Re: BrianS]
everyone Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 01/02/07
Posts: 597
Loc: USA
Landus,

A group of 4-6 guys and one sucker punches you? This is a bunch of loser cowards. I hope you called the police and are willing to charge them with assult. These jerks need some jail time to help them learn how to conduct themselves in civil society.

Don't be hard on yourself, unless you didn't report the crime. These types of people have to be taken off the street and be taught a lesson (by the judicial system).

Michael

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