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#395526 - 05/15/08 01:20 PM what to do
penquin Offline
Member

Registered: 03/31/08
Posts: 130
Loc: Kimberly, WI, USA
I decided to go back for my black belt. I found an ATA school with a good teacher. I verbally said I want to join. I have yet signed papers. Legally I am not bound, but ethically I am. My wife's, son's, and daughter's instructor wants me to join with him; because of my home instruction they are really good for their level. I just figured out how to keep the kids occupied for the classes if I did join, but I feel I owe it to the ATA instructor to stay with him. The gas prices being high I want to join my families instructor, and the price of their instructor is cheaper then the ATA instructor.

My main goals are to obtain a black belt and lose weight to get my surgery for my hernia. I can do both at either location.

I am so confused
_________________________
being smarter then the average man, my mistakes tend to be worse then the average man

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#395527 - 05/15/08 01:25 PM Re: what to do [Re: penquin]
harlan Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 07/31/04
Posts: 6664
Loc: Amherst, MA
So...who is more important to please? Your WIFE or some stranger who wants your paycheck???

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#395528 - 05/15/08 01:32 PM Re: what to do [Re: harlan]
ITFJJ Offline
Member

Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 88
Loc: Montréal
Not that the training to get to the black belt test isn't a sacrifice in and of itself, but why make life harder than it needs to be? I would be looking at the club where your family is already taking classes. Unless you find the quality of instruction to be suspect, it sounds like a win-win.
_________________________
ITF II Dan

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#395529 - 05/15/08 01:43 PM Re: what to do [Re: penquin]
JMWcorwin Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 07/13/07
Posts: 731
Loc: SoCal, USA
Yup,

Easy call. Go with the wife and kids, or it will bite you in the a$$ at home eventually. You don't owe the ATA guy anything... school owners get someone every single day that says they're going to join and never returns. I used to have a guy who would come in every other week, watch a class, say he's going to sign up, then I wouldn't see him until the next time he "wanted to sign up".

No worries man.
_________________________
There are no PERFECT techniques, only perfect execution for the situation at hand. ~Corwin

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#395530 - 05/15/08 02:25 PM Re: what to do [Re: penquin]
everyone Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 01/02/07
Posts: 597
Loc: USA
I would, without question, join with your families school. Give the other instuctor a call and say, "Thank you for the opportunity to train with you but at this time I am chosing to train at the same school as the rest of my family." He/She will understand.

BUT, DO NOT TRAIN WITH YOUR FAMILIES SCHOOL IF:
*You can't humble yourself and possible accept a lower ranking then your wife and child.
*You want to be the assistant instructor for your family
*You don't keep your mouth closed and your ears open
*You want to tell people how good you are and how you should be a higher belt

To keep the peace with your family and your new school, start fresh with an open mind.

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#395531 - 05/18/08 11:13 PM Re: what to do [Re: everyone]
VDJ Offline
Veteran

Registered: 05/09/05
Posts: 1674
Your family is the greatest gift given you, why would you want to be separated from that ? I train with my son and one of my daughters, we are our schools "Team" Forms team and its a great way to bond ! Oh, and what everyone says in the second part of their post !

VDJ

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#395532 - 05/19/08 10:09 AM Re: what to do [Re: VDJ]
penquin Offline
Member

Registered: 03/31/08
Posts: 130
Loc: Kimberly, WI, USA
My wife wants me in the ATA class. Her instructor seems to need numbers. I have not been asked to pay the ATA instructor(I also asked if I needed to pay same answer)


BUT, DO NOT TRAIN WITH YOUR FAMILIES SCHOOL IF:
*You can't humble yourself and possible accept a lower ranking then your wife and child.
He would give me my current rank or equivalent.

*You want to be the assistant instructor for your family

My wife wants me to be at home assistant instructor.

*You don't keep your mouth closed and your ears open

I always do in regular company(meaning away from this forum)

*You want to tell people how good you are and how you
should be a higher belt

I don't I just ask if I should( It shouldn't hurt to ask, should it?)
_________________________
being smarter then the average man, my mistakes tend to be worse then the average man

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#395533 - 05/19/08 10:50 AM Re: what to do [Re: penquin]
trevek Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 05/15/05
Posts: 3337
Loc: Poland
I agree with everyone, simply go to the guy and explain the situation. I am a great believer in always leaving the lines of communication open (unless there's a reason not to). The guy should understand and accept your decision. If he doesn't then it is a good sign you were better off not training there.
_________________________
See how well I block your punches with my jaw!!

Supporting everyone saying "nuts to cancer"

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#395534 - 05/19/08 10:53 AM Re: what to do [Re: trevek]
harlan Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 07/31/04
Posts: 6664
Loc: Amherst, MA
I don't understand why your wife would prefer you to train at a different school than her and the kids (the ATA place)...and still want you to activily support/train them at home. Sounds like some more family discussion needs to take place about expectations.

Good luck with your training, and whatever you choose.

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#395535 - 05/19/08 01:17 PM Re: what to do [Re: harlan]
dandjurdjevic Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 05/10/08
Posts: 844
Loc: Australia
Wife and kids every time.
_________________________
http://www.dandjurdjevic.com/

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