I decided to go back for my black belt. I found an ATA school with a good teacher. I verbally said I want to join. I have yet signed papers. Legally I am not bound, but ethically I am. My wife's, son's, and daughter's instructor wants me to join with him; because of my home instruction they are really good for their level. I just figured out how to keep the kids occupied for the classes if I did join, but I feel I owe it to the ATA instructor to stay with him. The gas prices being high I want to join my families instructor, and the price of their instructor is cheaper then the ATA instructor.

My main goals are to obtain a black belt and lose weight to get my surgery for my hernia. I can do both at either location.

I am so confused

So...who is more important to please? Your WIFE or some stranger who wants your paycheck???

Not that the training to get to the black belt test isn't a sacrifice in and of itself, but why make life harder than it needs to be? I would be looking at the club where your family is already taking classes. Unless you find the quality of instruction to be suspect, it sounds like a win-win.

Yup,

Easy call. Go with the wife and kids, or it will bite you in the a$$ at home eventually. You don't owe the ATA guy anything... school owners get someone every single day that says they're going to join and never returns. I used to have a guy who would come in every other week, watch a class, say he's going to sign up, then I wouldn't see him until the next time he "wanted to sign up".

No worries man.

I would, without question, join with your families school. Give the other instuctor a call and say, "Thank you for the opportunity to train with you but at this time I am chosing to train at the same school as the rest of my family." He/She will understand.

BUT, DO NOT TRAIN WITH YOUR FAMILIES SCHOOL IF:
*You can't humble yourself and possible accept a lower ranking then your wife and child.
*You want to be the assistant instructor for your family
*You don't keep your mouth closed and your ears open
*You want to tell people how good you are and how you should be a higher belt

To keep the peace with your family and your new school, start fresh with an open mind.

Your family is the greatest gift given you, why would you want to be separated from that ? I train with my son and one of my daughters, we are our schools "Team" Forms team and its a great way to bond ! Oh, and what everyone says in the second part of their post !

VDJ

My wife wants me in the ATA class. Her instructor seems to need numbers. I have not been asked to pay the ATA instructor(I also asked if I needed to pay same answer)


BUT, DO NOT TRAIN WITH YOUR FAMILIES SCHOOL IF:
*You can't humble yourself and possible accept a lower ranking then your wife and child.
He would give me my current rank or equivalent.

*You want to be the assistant instructor for your family

My wife wants me to be at home assistant instructor.

*You don't keep your mouth closed and your ears open

I always do in regular company(meaning away from this forum)

*You want to tell people how good you are and how you
should be a higher belt

I don't I just ask if I should( It shouldn't hurt to ask, should it?)

I agree with everyone, simply go to the guy and explain the situation. I am a great believer in always leaving the lines of communication open (unless there's a reason not to). The guy should understand and accept your decision. If he doesn't then it is a good sign you were better off not training there.

I don't understand why your wife would prefer you to train at a different school than her and the kids (the ATA place)...and still want you to activily support/train them at home. Sounds like some more family discussion needs to take place about expectations.

Good luck with your training, and whatever you choose.

Wife and kids every time.