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#329046 - 03/16/07 03:16 PM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: Taison]
oldman Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 07/28/04
Posts: 5884
Is he a buddhist?

#329047 - 03/16/07 03:22 PM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: Taison]
butterfly Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 08/25/04
Posts: 3012
Loc: Torrance, CA
Taison, not saying you would...and definitely not saying you should...hurt someone. (BTW, Brad is fine.) But, you are not alone.

Just about every martial artist has come up on that end of things. And then you get the daydreams of what-if...and bashing some schmuck's head in...which in reality will be a worse thing to endure--pschologically and legally. But day dreams are what they are and can occur because of an internal conflict for which you are trying to express, on one level, a gratifying solution. In this case of head bashing, in a caveman like way.

On the other hand, the realization may come to one that how others behave is only that.... how they behave and nothing else. This is external to you and needs to be corrected by the other idividual. How you take and accept this behavior are different things. The other person ignites your passions, irritations, hatred, etc., then it is an internal undertaking on your part to find the appropriate response and not let it get to you. How you control the situation and look at the problem thus begins and ends with you, despite the cause being the other guy.

Take care and I hope you get some of that Swedish food you enjoy. Lutefisk ain't it for me, that's fo sho'.

#329048 - 03/16/07 06:42 PM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: butterfly]
Stormdragon Offline
Who Dares Wins
Professional Poster

Registered: 08/05/04
Posts: 3409
Loc: Salem, OR
Next time he talks junk saying you are fake and cant fight and are a joke and blah blah blah (especially in front of people) casually but confidently challenge him to prove it and fight you. If he backs down which is likely then you make him look like an idiot and regain yoru good reputation, if not then yo uhave ap lethora of skills to use on him without having to really hurt him even. Just embarrass him. Problem solved. Always works for me.
Member of DaJoGen MMA school under Dave Hagen and Team Chaos fight team under Denver Mangiyatan and Chris Toquero, ran out of Zanshin Martial Arts in Salem Oregon:,

#329049 - 03/16/07 10:26 PM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: Taison]
WuXing Offline

Registered: 10/24/05
Posts: 481
Loc: Idaho, USA
"Because he does not compete,
He does not meet competition."

"No fight: No blame."

Yield and overcome;
Bend and be straight;
Empty and be full;
Wear out and be new;
Have little and gain;
Have much and be confused.

"Therefore the wise embrace the one
And set an example to all.
Not putting on a display,
They shine forth.
Not justifying themselves,
They are distinguished.
Not boasting,
They receive recognition.
Not bragging,
They never falter.
They do not quarrel,
So no one quarrels with them.
Therefore the ancients say, "Yield and overcome."
Is that an empty saying?
Be really whole,
And all things will come to you."

#329050 - 03/17/07 12:35 AM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: butterfly]
Taison Offline
The Forum Dragon
Professional Poster

Registered: 09/06/05
Posts: 3629
Loc: BKK, Thailand
Oldman, he's Taoist. Although he claims he's buddhist he's only doing lip-service. He doesn't know any type of psalms, chants or tantra.

Brad, I can see where you're coming from. It's more of an internal thing going on in my head. Even though he is the cause, it's definitely affecting me internally. It began with him and will end with me if I can just figure out how. Swedish food... oh well, I got kaviar in the fridge.

Storm, If I was to challenge him, I think he'd just get hurt real badly and then he'll sue me. You know how these idiots are like, they challenge you, use excess force, you respond with same amount of force, then they sue you.

Wuxing, thanks.

-Taison out
I got two fists.. Don't make me use my head as well!

#329051 - 03/17/07 03:59 AM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: Taison]
ButterflyPalm Offline

Registered: 08/26/04
Posts: 2637
Loc: Malaysia
A classic example of "Attachment"

In this case an attachment to your EEEEEgo.

It's not what others think of you that's important, it's what you think of yourself.

Gossips get to you because you are NOT sure of yourself or your own abilities. Even if you go out to prove to each and everyone of those people that you've got what it takes, it will actually only satisfy YOUR own Ego, because to all those people they couldn't care less (and rightly so because they are more concerned about THEIR EEEEEgo, not YOURS) and would have forgotten you and your abilities immediately after the next cigarette or next Coke. Then when you find out, you would have felt all Empty Inside and then you'll start another Thread about that.

Meditate On That.

Ommmm Mani Patmi Ommmmm........

BTW, how many pf those "friends" think you can't heck it?....5,7, 10?...well, here you have hundreds who think you's that for some Ego Massage
I'll rather be happy than right, anytime.

#329052 - 03/17/07 11:59 PM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: ButterflyPalm]
Taison Offline
The Forum Dragon
Professional Poster

Registered: 09/06/05
Posts: 3629
Loc: BKK, Thailand
Ah Chun shu shu,

You've got a point there. I'll go reflect on that as well.

The thing that doesn't bother me is if they think I can't do it, the thing that bothers me is that they branded me a liar. I mean, I got certificates and I could display, but I'm not that type of person that goes around showing everyone my certificates and then breaks limbs just to prove my point (maybe I should start doing that?)

Anyway, thanks for the help Butterfly.


Ommmm Mani Patmi Ommmmm........

Ommm.... Yup nor, pong nor.... Ommm......

-Taison out
I got two fists.. Don't make me use my head as well!

#329053 - 03/18/07 11:17 AM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: ButterflyPalm]
pepto_bismol Offline
infinite kudos

Registered: 03/04/06
Posts: 480

A classic example of "Attachment"

In this case an attachment to your EEEEEgo.

agreed... still, that guy sounds like he needs to get his face kicked in. I am sure if he got his ass kicked he would be humble.

He doesn't sound like the kind of guy that would call the cops so you would probably be fine.

Of course you could also live your life without ever having to hurt him or be hurt yourself, but then your ego would always be insulted, your mind uneasy, and your meditation weak. (even though you will probably get over it in time)

That's just my opinion, I could be wrong.
YAY pepto bismol! No... not... kryptonite

#329054 - 03/18/07 11:48 AM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: Taison]
Taison Offline
The Forum Dragon
Professional Poster

Registered: 09/06/05
Posts: 3629
Loc: BKK, Thailand
I think I've got a way to deal with my 'demon'.

I've been meditating, and though it may sound like fictious, I figured out what it was. I was thinking of ButterflyPalm's post and the part about ego.

The 'demon' IS my ego. Have you ever seen a predator trapped in a cage and fed? You see that the 'mighty' beast doesn't look 'mighty' but more like lazy and obese. That's what's happening to me now. I'm not in training now, and that guy's attack on my abilities was the 'spark' with my demon.

I've been deafened, I couldn't properly communicate with myself. It's like listening to a song, but you can't make out the lyrics.

So when I decided that my ego was trying to tell me something, I stood up and looked myself in the mirror and ended up saying, to my disbelief 'WTF is this thing??'

I'm out of shape, I'm bearded, and most of all, I don't have that 'killer eyes'. In simple words, I look docile.

It's time that I break the barrier between me and the 'demon'. It's time that Taison goes out and works for his title of 'Tai Zun'.

It's time, that I beat myself into shape, and start swinging my fists to hurt people. That's what I live for! I've totally forgot my childhood dream, to be the strongest fighter.

Ok, enough of this ranting, I'm going to go get some training. Laters ya'll.

-Taison out
I got two fists.. Don't make me use my head as well!

#329055 - 03/18/07 02:32 PM Re: 'Inner Demons' [Re: Taison]
oldcoach Offline

Registered: 07/19/06
Posts: 130

What exactly is it you "do" when you meditate? Do you notice when thoughts occur in your mind? Don't try to chase them away. Just notice them. "Hey, here's a thought-bunny".

If plans and schemes come to you for smashing the guy's face in, "Hey, another thought-bunny. Big one this time".

More thoughts come? "Hey, we're having a thought-bunny convention". Whatever comes to your mind is just a thought. Let it come, don;t fight it, don't chase it away. Just let it be. Just notice it. It will go away on its own. Some thoughts are more persistent than others. Still, just notice them, let them be, and let them fade.

It's like TRYING to fall asleep. The more you TRY, the more you can't fall asleep.


As for the "friend", here's a thought.

Instead of confronting him, or making him "pay", how about enlisting his help?


First, some background. This guy is doing all that bodybuilding thing, right? Could it be that's he's actually feels insecure around you, unconsciously fearing that whatever he does is not the "real thing" and that you might be tougher than him? And to "prove" to himself that what he's doing is the "real thing", he had to put you down to lift himself up ?

For example, for years, when athletically-inclined people find out I do martial arts, they invariably tell me they have done some "Thai boxing" (notice that they don't say Muay Thai, but "Thai boxing" which shows, at least to me, the lack of depth to which they failed to study the art), with the implication that since "Thai boxing" is so tough, then they're tougher than me because they did "Thai boxing" in kiddie-garten thousands of years ago.

So, your friend could be very insecure around you because yours is "the Real Coke" and he's just got a no-name pop soda.

In any case, instead of confronting him, call him, and sincerely compliments him on what he's doing, about his dedication to developing a great body, about how focused he must be to continue doing all that training, etc., etc. After, body-building is a discipline by itself, and takes work and dedication. You should know that better than him. After all, you've dedicated yourself to training all these years.

Then enlist his help.

How? Tell him that you understand that he has some great knowledge about building muscles. Now, you're not interested in building big muscles like his. Tell him that. Tell him that you can never build the kind of muscles he already has. But what you do want to know is how specific body-building exercises can be adapted to help increase power, speed, strength, explosiveness, etc.

Tell him that your kicks are pretty good right now. Show him. Have him hold a power pad or something. Blast it with your roundhouses (hard, but not so hard that you reinforce his insecurity). Now tell him although you are quite satisfied with your power, you were wondering if he knew about other power-enhancing weight training that you didn't already know about.

If he asks you what you already know, show him. If he "criticises" your method, ask sincere questions about how he would do it. And listen. You're not trying to compete with him. You're trying to build a bridge that connects the two of you.

If you could get some friends (preferably mutual acquaintances) together to learn from him, you could kill two birds with one stone: 1) build him up in his own eyes and in the eyes of his friends, and 2) demonstrate your capabilities.

It'll take some thought on how to carry out this mission with finesse without coming over as ingratiating or hostile, but it can be done. All it takes is sincerity and a decent regard for this guy as a fellow human being.

Give it some thought.

Me, I'd just as soon kick his face in, but hey, we're martial artists, not Wolverine, so we go for the "elegant solution"

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