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#248777 - 04/25/06 10:14 AM The worst Martial Arts Movies
Wosaw Offline
Newbie

Registered: 04/06/06
Posts: 16
Just thought it'd be funny to hear what you guys think are the worst martial arts movies (or dealing with MA, the movie doesn't have to be literally about MA) you have ever seen. Please dont get offended if someone picks on your favorite move or w/e. Its just someone opinion Anyways, I would have to say the worst Martial Arts movies I've seen are:

Mortal Kombat: Annihilation
Highlander 4: Endgame
Batman and Robin
Street Fighter (both the one with Van Damn and sonny chiba)
Double Dragon (even though I liked it when i was younger)

and thats all I can think of for now.

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#248778 - 04/25/06 11:59 AM Re: The worst Martial Arts Movies [Re: Wosaw]
Cord Offline
Prolific

Registered: 01/13/05
Posts: 11399
Loc: Cambridge UK.
Sorry, you put chiba's Streetfighter on the list, you're gonna upset me

enter the ninja
knock Off
Van Damme's Streetfighter
Anything by Steven Segal post Glimmer Man, especially 'The Foreigner'
Double Team
Ring of Fire
Anything with Sho Kosugi.

Chiba indeed- tsk tsk
_________________________
Don't let the door hit ya' where the good lord split ya'
http://cord.mybrute.com

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#248779 - 04/25/06 01:28 PM Re: The worst Martial Arts Movies [Re: Wosaw]
MattJ Offline
Free Rhinoplasty!
Prolific

Registered: 11/25/04
Posts: 15634
Loc: York PA. USA
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - whoever decided to do those movies in that surfer-dude vein should be shot. An insult to the excellent (and TOTALLY different) comics from which they sprang.

3 Ninjas (and all the idiot sequels, too) -

_________________________
"In case you ever wondered what it's like to be knocked out, it's like waking up from a nightmare only to discover it wasn't a dream." -Forrest Griffin

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#248780 - 04/25/06 01:54 PM Re: The worst Martial Arts Movies [Re: MattJ]
Dereck Offline
Prolific

Registered: 10/04/04
Posts: 10413
Loc: Great White North
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon ... and any other movie were they float through the air.
_________________________
"IF I COME ... I'M BRINGING THE PAIN WITH ME"

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#248781 - 04/25/06 02:10 PM Re: The worst Martial Arts Movies [Re: Wosaw]
Ed_Morris Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 11/04/05
Posts: 6768
this seems to've been done before...my vote is still 'Gymkata'.

here are some common traits and things to watch for in a bad MA movie:

Bad movie storylines:

* The 'Hero' never get owned but makes the bad guys look like fools, saves the day and gets the girl....all without pulling a trigger or hiring a lawyer.
OR he DOES get owned in the beggining and trains for the rest of the movie to get his revenge....oh yeah, and he gets the girl too. see: van Damme.

* our Hero trains with a mysterious white-haired master on top of a mountain for years...the rest of the story revolves around that; usually with the master giving the student his mission in life before dying ... the movie constantly refers to that training in the form of a flashback. copied from the 'kung fu' TV series.

Bad movie scenarios:

- A samurai vs. Ninja on top of a 40 story office building in downtown Dallas. 80's ninja flicks.

- Police or authorities always arriving at the scene just when the good guy is debating whether to waste the bad guy or not..."No! dont do it! He's not worth it!" ala 'billy jack', 'best of the best', etc.. the MA flicks with a moral delemma as the axis to deliving it's fortune cookie wisdom.

- when a character holds a hand out and motions 'Come get some.'

- bad guy explaining the full evil plot while the good guy, bound and tied, pretends to listen while secretly planning some adhoc means of escape. copied from 007 movies.

- hero always has a one-liner before wasting a bad guy. copied from spehgetti westerns with C. Eastwood.

- overuse of wirework.

- movies where the character has absolutely no sense of humor, but yet chooses to display this trait during a fight.

- MTV-like 1-sec scene cuts and video shakes during fight sequences.

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#248782 - 04/25/06 05:27 PM Re: The worst Martial Arts Movies [Re: Dereck]
MattJ Offline
Free Rhinoplasty!
Prolific

Registered: 11/25/04
Posts: 15634
Loc: York PA. USA
Quote:

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon ... and any other movie were they float through the air.






Now you've done it, Dereck. Have you actually watched CTHD? That was a really good flick, and I am no fan of wirework.

I ask the rest of the forum to avert their eyes whist I (err....find someone to) kick Dereck's ass.
_________________________
"In case you ever wondered what it's like to be knocked out, it's like waking up from a nightmare only to discover it wasn't a dream." -Forrest Griffin

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#248783 - 04/25/06 05:53 PM Re: The worst Martial Arts Movies [Re: MattJ]
Dereck Offline
Prolific

Registered: 10/04/04
Posts: 10413
Loc: Great White North
Have I actually watched it? I sat there for the whole gruelling movie at home, so yes I watched it. It was all over the place. The questions should be, have you watched it?

- Here's my ass ... kick away.
_________________________
"IF I COME ... I'M BRINGING THE PAIN WITH ME"

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#248784 - 04/25/06 05:53 PM Re: The worst Martial Arts Movies [Re: MattJ]
Raul Perez Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 08/08/02
Posts: 2805
Loc: Lake Ronkonkoma, NY, USA
No retreat, No Surrender.... Like Van Damm's first movie appearance. Terrible movie but some good martial arts.
_________________________
"I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey"

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#248785 - 04/25/06 05:59 PM Re: The worst Martial Arts Movies [Re: Wosaw]
sandan63 Offline
Member

Registered: 03/08/06
Posts: 45
Loc: DETROIT,MI.
all good films compared to my worst of all time:screaming ninja

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#248786 - 04/25/06 06:15 PM Re: The worst Martial Arts Movies [Re: sandan63]
Cord Offline
Prolific

Registered: 01/13/05
Posts: 11399
Loc: Cambridge UK.
Ok, that must be bad, I havent even heard of it
_________________________
Don't let the door hit ya' where the good lord split ya'
http://cord.mybrute.com

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