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#132985 - 02/02/04 12:46 PM does any one else have this problem

Registered: 04/28/03
Posts: 68
this doesn't realy have anyhting to do with teaching and learning but i dont know any where else to post this. does anyone elses girlfriend/wife give them a hard time about studying martial arts. like that it takes up to much time or that u like martial arts more then u like them, etc. i already had to dump 2 girl friends for giving me a hard time over martial arts and i only go to 3 classes a week. just wondering if anyone has had similiar problems.

#132986 - 02/02/04 02:06 PM Re: does any one else have this problem
NancyP Offline

Registered: 10/02/03
Posts: 119
Loc: Florida

On the contrary, my husband thinks it's great that his wife and daughter train. He often brags about it - though I really wish he wouldn't :-). There have been times when our instructor was unable to make a tournament and he has "stepped in" to coach - actually does a pretty good job of it, too. Hang in there! Someone will find your passion for martial arts interesting. Who knows, maybe so interested that they'll start to train, too.


#132987 - 02/02/04 04:54 PM Re: does any one else have this problem

These women were testing you-trying to discover or prove how much control over you they had.

Watch out for the clingy, needy ones who want to train with you-they are trying to insinuate themselves into every aspect of your life with only one goal-total utter domination of your life.

That is why you never give out your real name, use an easy to remember alias (ie. "Bob")or name of coworker you don't like much.Never let them know where you live or work-Always call them from random payphones located in different parts of town or from someone else's cellphone.

Remember, They can take your life-but they can never take your Freeeedommmm!!!!!!

#132988 - 02/03/04 05:23 AM Re: does any one else have this problem
Yoseikan Student Offline

Registered: 05/02/03
Posts: 1166
Loc: UK


#132989 - 02/03/04 06:55 AM Re: does any one else have this problem
JohnL Offline
Professional Poster

Registered: 03/24/03
Posts: 4309
Loc: NY, NY, USA
Hi nekogami13

I think you have a few life issues to sort out before you start giving advice on this subject.


#132990 - 02/03/04 07:41 PM Re: does any one else have this problem

One quick thing about previous post-last part should be read in a scottish accent while imagining me typing it while wearing a kilt.

As for johnl-my court appointed therapist agrees with you [IMG][/IMG]

#132991 - 02/04/04 01:24 AM Re: does any one else have this problem
mark Offline
sword of magnamity

Registered: 03/04/03
Posts: 1284
Loc: uk

not in the least..

My wife is 4th Dan Karate, 1st dan jujitsu, 1st dan kenpo, 1st dan tang-soo-doo.

Best student i ever "HAD" (snigger!)

AND she does the washing up.....



#132992 - 03/15/04 06:00 AM Re: does any one else have this problem
schanne Offline
breaks things

Registered: 02/18/04
Posts: 4370
Loc: Woodbury NJ
Find a new girlfriend.

#132993 - 03/15/04 06:07 AM Re: does any one else have this problem

I have had problems with ex boyfriends in the past (my es-husband was the worst)

Men that don't train are often intimidated by a woman who is serious about their training.

Conversly, I had one (short-lived) relationship with a guy who was far too excited by it and wanted to incorporate it into our "personal" life [IMG][/IMG] At the same time he hated me training with "all those men". I just could not convince him that once in a gi everyone was just a training partner or an instructor regardles of gender (it's hardly the most flattering outfit, I look huge in mine).

My second husband is senior to me and very supportive so it is no longer a problem.

#132994 - 03/15/04 08:10 AM Re: does any one else have this problem
MartinR Offline

Registered: 01/14/04
Posts: 109
Loc: Winston-Salem, NC
One of the guys I studied with in the past once said that there were three important points for a sucessful long term relationship:
1. Common Values
2. Common Goals
3. Mutual Respect

If any one is missing, you will have major problems in the long term.

A few years ago I lost a girlfriend due to our differing values - especialy our difference in attitude toward fighting in general. (She was a Jehovah's Witness and believed that war and fighting was wrong). At the time I would have dropped almost anything for her, but in retrospect she did the right thing to break up with me.

I found and married a wonderful woman that I love and who loves me. We have the common goals, values, and mutual respect that are key to a long term relationship. It just happens that she even trains with me when she can.

Good luck.


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