.....Why?

Posted by: scorpion

.....Why? - 03/03/06 06:57 AM

well at the moment theres a guy about 5ft, im 6ft2 and he has randomly decided to start on me for no reason whatsoever,
i dont even know this guy and havent even done anything to him.
yet when he sees me he starts approaching me arms flailing to make himself look big and thinks hes it.

he does boxing as well and supposedly has a good reputation in it.
thing is he dosent know that i study tae kwon do.
and he doset even know that i study martial arts at all.....i have experience in self defence as well
and this would be my first encounter......thing is he wants me to fight him but theres no chance im going to....this is why he gets angry with me......im a man of peace so what makes people like him try to pick fights with guys like me?
Posted by: Cord

Re: .....Why? - 03/03/06 07:22 AM

Ask him.
Posted by: BrianS

Re: .....Why? - 03/03/06 07:25 AM

Quote:

im a man of peace so what makes people like him try to pick fights with guys like me?







Insecurity?
Posted by: scorpion

Re: .....Why? - 03/03/06 08:14 AM

insecurity


maybe
im always nervous when hes about but not sure how to show confidence i always take flight response
i said whats your problem and he jus makes like a grunting "eeurrrghh [censored]" kinda voice
its just so random why ive been chosen
Posted by: Joss

Re: .....Why? - 03/03/06 08:17 AM

Methinks "Man of Peace" or "Scorpion" may have an unresolved internal debate. The words say "Man of Peace". "Scorpion" says otherwise .
Posted by: scorpion

Re: .....Why? - 03/03/06 08:32 AM

Quote:

Methinks "Man of Peace" or "Scorpion" may have an unresolved internal debate. The words say "Man of Peace". "Scorpion" says otherwise .




true one part says have confidence the other says no confidence....and thinks about the aftermath of what could happen
Posted by: Zombie Zero

Re: .....Why? - 03/03/06 09:30 AM

Quote:

what makes people like him try to pick fights with guys like me?





Napoleon complex. Buy him a beer, and settle it over an arm wrestling match.
Posted by: umsangil

Re: .....Why? - 03/03/06 03:04 PM

maybe he chose you as a target because somehow you seem weak to him. (shrug) im not saying you are weak but maybe he perceives you as weak. he might not like something about you whether its the way you hold yourself or who you hang out with or what you do. i dunno, bullies are weird like that. i was picked on because i was skinny. then because i wore glasses. finally it was because i hung out with "weird people"... dont let it phase you. just try talking to him.
Posted by: bo-ken

Re: .....Why? - 03/03/06 03:21 PM

Some dude at the YMCA the other day asked to fight me. He said "You the karate dude." and I said "Yeah." He said why don't you fight this boxer here. I knew the ex-boxer he was talking about and he looked at me and said "Who's a boxer." I laughed and just said you don't want to see me fight and he walked away. Both of these guys were taller and MUCH heavier then me but be confidence is what you need. I just made it seem likely it didn't bother me at all.
Posted by: TwistingKick

Re: .....Why? - 03/03/06 05:36 PM

If he percieves you as weak it may have something to do with your height.
He obviously thinks a) you will definately not fight back and he is trying to look tough by challenging someone so much bigger than him, or b) genuinely thinks he can beat you in a fight and hopes you will fight back so he has the chance to beat you and "prove" himself to be tough.

Either way IMHO he is doing it to make himself appear "tough" and "fearless"
Posted by: scorpion

Re: .....Why? - 03/05/06 02:53 PM

Quote:

genuinely thinks he can beat you in a fight and hopes you will fight back so he has the chance to beat you and "prove" himself to be tough.

Either way IMHO he is doing it to make himself appear "tough" and "fearless"




thats true exactly

but i think i just need to know how to gain self confidence to make myself look tough around the school .....to show im not weak and hopefully look less of a target
Posted by: TwistingKick

Re: .....Why? - 03/05/06 03:25 PM

Quote:

but i think i just need to know how to gain self confidence to make myself look tough around the school




I am the same, I have confidence in my ability to defend myself in most situations, but don't show it too well.
One thing i would say is try to never look at the floor when they are around or talking to you, even if that means lookin over their head, lol. Just generally try to act like it doesn't faze you , but still stay alert.

I usually laugh at them as if you find the fact that they want to start a fight quite pathetic, but i wouldn't suggest it cos sometimes it leads to the inevitable "what you laughin at" and only escalates things.

It also comes down to whether you are confident in your ability to defend yourself.

Just MHO
Posted by: Cord

Re: .....Why? - 03/05/06 03:29 PM

Ever play poker? If you have a strong hand, it is not wise to let anyone know so. Life is a bit like that. By trying to display strength, you will set yourself up as more of a target. In situations like this, the best advice i can give you is to remain quiet. Keep a steady gaze, but say nothing. This gives this jerk nothing to guage you by. If he cant get a strong picture of what you are feeling, he cant know what to expect. You are always more wary of the unknown.
I am shameless in using whatever analogies best explain my point so to give a fictional example: Be Clint Eastwood in Fistfull of Dollars, not Joe Pesci in Goodfellas

Just be yourself, spend more time observing others than changing what others see of you. You dont need to swear and swagger about to punch someone hard in the face if you need to.
Posted by: Diabolic

Re: .....Why? - 03/08/06 12:56 AM

Back in highschool I use to run into this kind of crap all the time. On my way to the wrestling room after school I would pass all the "jocks" and they would always stare me down(I am 5'7). I just learned that I need to stare back and keep my head up. Now in college years later, when I pass those same types of guys I gaze at them first. When they see me they either smile or look down/away. I just learned the pre-emptive stare now.
When I walk around campus I kinda do it for fun now, its amazing how many people walk around with their heads somewhat down. I am also alot bigger now.

Food for thought. (Back in highschool)
Freshman year my friend was 5'11 and weighed about 150. He walked pigeon toed and his middle name was Lindsey.(Pathetic right?) He got so sick of being picked on that he started wrestling softmore year and tought himself not to walk pigeon toed. By senior year he gained about 45 lbs and wrestled in the 189 division, winning almost every match and taking home division titles in greco and freestyle. Now he is 210 and hella swollz. No one would think of messing with him these days. This is what happens to people who get picked on, for all you people who pick on people
Posted by: Mr_Moogle

Re: .....Why? - 04/07/06 11:57 AM

Hmmmmmm... guys like these pick on what they think are weaker than they are just for the ego boost. I've seen one, encountered one, shutted him up (didn't get to fight with him, but that just shows how "all talk" he is).

Maybe try to ask him why. Ask him why he wants to pick a fight with you, why no one else? Tell him if he knows boxing and stuff, shouldn't he go for the better, more powerful opponents than yourself for a better challenge (pretend you don't know MA). If he still persists, then get the teachers and stuff involved. If he still persists, ask him to p**s off and to shut up about the whole thing. And if he starts getting physical, then next paragraph...

He does boxing right? Well naturally you would aim for the legs and the balls, but that is it. Do not go close range with him, ever. Keep using side kicks and front kicks to push him back (and hopefully crack some nice damage at him) and always aim for the vital spots. Crack a few shots to his ankles and knee joints if you want to hinder his movement and to give him some pain, but finish it fast. If you're very good at timing, if he tries charging at you, the moment he is about to, front kick his shin to stop his step in. Whatever it is, you must keep it at long kicking range, never close.

Well, I'd recommend you talk it out with him and ask him for the reasons. Only follow the fighting advice if he starts the fight and starts getting physical with you.

That's all, hope this helps.
Posted by: charlie

Re: .....Why? - 04/20/06 04:11 PM

I had a little problem like this in school. This guy, lets just call him 'SS' had a bit of a reputation with people at our school - he had beaten up a few weaker and younger guys. however it used to really annoy him when people used to say to him "I bet you could not beat up Charlie" (we were in the same year) so he would always want to fight me.

I had a reputation of being a good laugh and a good martial artist (i only did karate at that time) he would always pass messages through people saying that he wants a fight blah, blah, etc... but i would not fight him....unless he went for me that is.

my dad (karate/jujutsu BB) gave me some really good advice when i told him about it - he said if he confronts you say "look SS, i do not want to fight you.....but if we do i promise i will not mess around"! and then just walk off even if he said anything in return - this will cast doubt in his mind even if he does not show it.

in other words it's your choice but you will come worse off.

So i never had to self premote myself like SS did or like your guy because other people did it for me - which is the best way. it has always been the way 'right or wrong' that if poeple know you do martial arts it adds an air of mystery to you.

so if i were you it's not a bad thing in your case to allow poeple to know what you do, tell friends and allow the word to get to him that you are a martial artist - don't say what style or your grade but just that you do MA's and then you can go on being a man of peace and just stay quiet and avoid fighting.

as it goes when i go back to the area i grew up in i often see people who were part of the 'cool crowd' and you should see them now!! over weight/unfit/no-life and grumpy - so the worm has turned! when i saw SS it was no different...i just smiled to myself.

my dad also said that a big/tall guy automatically gains respect with people.....a small guy has to earn it. (we are both about 5f 8/9.

just a final piece of advice - if i were you i would cross train in jujutsu and that's coming from someone who does Tae Kwon Do (ITF).

charlie.

www.lonepineryu.co.uk
www.impactfitnesstrainers.net
Posted by: Derik

Re: .....Why? - 04/21/06 01:46 AM

Boxing schools raise people like thats it awefull in my opionon... we have a school down here in a pretty bad nieghboorhood and theres alot of people that go there and then they just go around around and pick fights iwht people because they recieved training from this guy. I think i might walk down there in a few weeks and talk to the intructor, drop a few names of people abusing it.