Posted by: RazorFoot
Life Changing Moments - 10/24/07 08:08 AM
Since I have been on the forum these last couple of years, I have read many things that people have shared about their lives and their families. Things that have changed their lives forever in one way or another.
I have felt both priviledged and blessed to have been included in those discussions. People have shared losses, pain, tradgedy, joy, successes, and milestones. And through it all, we have all pulled together and supported one another to either provide strength and comfort, or celebration and recognition.
In reading of other's trials and achievements, you can not help but to reflect on your on life and look at the things that have changed you and the way you look at things forever. I was simply wondering if anyone wanted to share what they thought was the single most significant event that changed their life forever from that point moving forward. The one thing, good or bad, that made you stop, look at where you were, and tell yourself, "from this day forward, things will be different".
Mine was the loss of my second dad. When I was in my early twenties, I was working for a mall jewelry chain. I met a guy who worked for his father's TV repair company. Small, family owned business. And when I say family owned, that was it, him and his dad were the company. he said he thought I would be a good fit so he asked if I wante to work part time for them. I said sure and met his dad, Tom. Pretty rough exterior, street smart and kind of sarcastic, but very sharp. The type of guy who could turn a nickel into a dollar faster than you could blink. Always trying to find a deal and always thinking one step ahead. You couldn't help but to respect him, even if you didnt like him right away.
I worked there part time for a while and then because of some changes at my other job, I found myself working for them full time. Tom really didnt have the work at the time to afford a full time employee other than his son but he did it anyway. He and his wife helped me out through tough times, always looked out for me, and treated me like another one fo their children. I was going through some tough family stuff at the time and they advised me and walked me through it without judging me or making me feel anything less than what I should.
I found other better paying jobs, sometimes working two other jobs at the same time but I never stopped working with Tom. I always said "working with" and not "working for" when I was there because that is how he made it feel. It was fun to be around him and he taught me more about being a person and being a friend than my own real father did.
I worked with him for close to twelve years. At that point, I was part of their family. I called his wife "mom" and he was, as far as I was concerned, my father. We would go to lunch together sometimes two to three times a week, just to talk and hang out with one another. Sometimes his son would hang out with us but most times, he and I would just hang out and he would ask me how things were going or just get me out because he thought I could use some cheering up. He was like that.
Then, after twelve years of being part of the family, we found out that he had terminal cancer that had already spread too far through his body to be dealt with. He was one of the strongest, smartest people I knew. He was a friend, he was family, he was my "dad", and I was going to lose him.
His whole family was hit pretty hard by it. My friend, his son, was havign a really bad time watching his father go through what he did. We all did our best to stay positive and he actually made that easy by keeping an upbeat perspective and keeping his same demeanor regardless of the fact that he knew what was coming.
He did his best to hold on for as long as he could, believing it was what he should do for his family but in the end, "mom" had to tell him it was all right to let go. He didnt have to be in pain any more because he was trying to be strong for us. When she did, he kind of smiled, told her he loved her, and a few days later was gone.
He by no means was a perfect man and had made his share of mistakes along the way. As a young man, he had had his fair share of encounters with the police but he had turned hi slife around and done very well for him and his family. All of which he openly shared with me, some one who was not even his blood relative.
To this day, I still believe the time I spent knowing him and being part of his family, were some of the best times of my life and made me truly appreciate who and what is important in life.
I still think about my second dad all the time and I still go by to see his grave every once in a while. It has been about 10 years now since he's been gone and there are times that I still find myself thinking about what he taught me or thinking what he would do in a situation. Without the impact he had on me and my life, I doubt I would be the father to my son I am today. I owe him much.
Scottie
I have felt both priviledged and blessed to have been included in those discussions. People have shared losses, pain, tradgedy, joy, successes, and milestones. And through it all, we have all pulled together and supported one another to either provide strength and comfort, or celebration and recognition.
In reading of other's trials and achievements, you can not help but to reflect on your on life and look at the things that have changed you and the way you look at things forever. I was simply wondering if anyone wanted to share what they thought was the single most significant event that changed their life forever from that point moving forward. The one thing, good or bad, that made you stop, look at where you were, and tell yourself, "from this day forward, things will be different".
Mine was the loss of my second dad. When I was in my early twenties, I was working for a mall jewelry chain. I met a guy who worked for his father's TV repair company. Small, family owned business. And when I say family owned, that was it, him and his dad were the company. he said he thought I would be a good fit so he asked if I wante to work part time for them. I said sure and met his dad, Tom. Pretty rough exterior, street smart and kind of sarcastic, but very sharp. The type of guy who could turn a nickel into a dollar faster than you could blink. Always trying to find a deal and always thinking one step ahead. You couldn't help but to respect him, even if you didnt like him right away.
I worked there part time for a while and then because of some changes at my other job, I found myself working for them full time. Tom really didnt have the work at the time to afford a full time employee other than his son but he did it anyway. He and his wife helped me out through tough times, always looked out for me, and treated me like another one fo their children. I was going through some tough family stuff at the time and they advised me and walked me through it without judging me or making me feel anything less than what I should.
I found other better paying jobs, sometimes working two other jobs at the same time but I never stopped working with Tom. I always said "working with" and not "working for" when I was there because that is how he made it feel. It was fun to be around him and he taught me more about being a person and being a friend than my own real father did.
I worked with him for close to twelve years. At that point, I was part of their family. I called his wife "mom" and he was, as far as I was concerned, my father. We would go to lunch together sometimes two to three times a week, just to talk and hang out with one another. Sometimes his son would hang out with us but most times, he and I would just hang out and he would ask me how things were going or just get me out because he thought I could use some cheering up. He was like that.
Then, after twelve years of being part of the family, we found out that he had terminal cancer that had already spread too far through his body to be dealt with. He was one of the strongest, smartest people I knew. He was a friend, he was family, he was my "dad", and I was going to lose him.
His whole family was hit pretty hard by it. My friend, his son, was havign a really bad time watching his father go through what he did. We all did our best to stay positive and he actually made that easy by keeping an upbeat perspective and keeping his same demeanor regardless of the fact that he knew what was coming.
He did his best to hold on for as long as he could, believing it was what he should do for his family but in the end, "mom" had to tell him it was all right to let go. He didnt have to be in pain any more because he was trying to be strong for us. When she did, he kind of smiled, told her he loved her, and a few days later was gone.
He by no means was a perfect man and had made his share of mistakes along the way. As a young man, he had had his fair share of encounters with the police but he had turned hi slife around and done very well for him and his family. All of which he openly shared with me, some one who was not even his blood relative.
To this day, I still believe the time I spent knowing him and being part of his family, were some of the best times of my life and made me truly appreciate who and what is important in life.
I still think about my second dad all the time and I still go by to see his grave every once in a while. It has been about 10 years now since he's been gone and there are times that I still find myself thinking about what he taught me or thinking what he would do in a situation. Without the impact he had on me and my life, I doubt I would be the father to my son I am today. I owe him much.
Scottie
