"Problem Children"

Posted by: SNieves

"Problem Children" - 01/24/08 10:08 AM

Problem Children-

-Sometimes I will ask students to work out personally with me so I can reinforce their current training and shore up some techniques. One of my newer students, who has had previous training, asked what it was we were doing on Saturday? “Is that a testing??” I told him no, it’s a semi-private class where I invite students to work out with me and help them along. I told him eventually everyone gets that time with me (which they do). Mind you, this is the student that asked me on more than one occasion when he can test. I told him each time earning rank is not a race. He will earn it with time and work. Let me digress a bit and give you some information on our rank structure and testing procedures.

Our rank colors are: White, Green, Brown, Black, Red-White (Shihan), Red-Black (Soke Dai), and Red for Soke. White has 3 stripes, Green 2, Brown 3. Stripe Kyu rank are given as spot promotions. If a student demonstrates technical ability and maturity, they are promoted. If not, they wait. Color belt testing is done at a formal test. Normally we have formal testing in June and December. Testing is NOT automatic and it is by invitation ONLY. We do NOT give belts away. One is not invited to test unless they have shown they are ready in their class performance. One of our dojo mottos is: ‘every day is a test’. The test measures their endurance and how well a student can do under pressure. The candidate already has proven in daily performance and that they are competent. Formal Tests are a minimum of 2 hours for beginners and "until we are done" for higher ups.

I told him to come to class on Saturday at 10AM which is our normal time for training on Saturdays. He showed up, we worked on a few things and moved on. Next week I was expecting him and he didn’t show. He called me after class was over to tell me he couldn’t get the kids up because they were tired, that he was also tired because he normally goes out on Friday nights and it’s hard for him to get up. He then stated that maybe having class at noon would be better. I told him that’s the time I can get the room (our classes are held in at a Rec Center and a Church and have to share the space). I then told him, “Well, I guess I will see you in class on Tuesday? Have a great day!”. I wanted to curse him out but I played nice. That next Tuesday I made a general class announcement not to ask me for more training and then not show up.

How do you all handle such a situation?

Hasta.
Posted by: harlan

Re: "Problem Children" - 01/24/08 10:13 AM

I was kinda confused by the thread title. Just clarifying: you told an adult student to start showing up at a time/day different from normal training...and he couldn't make it and didn't call or communicate to you in advance that it wouldn't work out?

Without some kind of 'good reason', like a belt-test or to meet and greet with some 'grand poo-bah' of a system, I don't see any problem with it.
Posted by: SNieves

Re: "Problem Children" - 01/24/08 10:25 AM

I don't understand your response. But to help clarify: this student consistantly asked to test and wanted to train more often. He asked to come train with me on more than one occassion. I told him to come and train on Saturday. That Saturday he called me AFTER class was over stating he couldn't come because he had gone out the night before and usually goes out on Fridays. He also made several comments that he wished we would change the times so he could come. My stance is: you wanted to come on Saturdays to train, I gave you the invitation and made myself available. Then he comes with an excuse why he couldn't. That is also the time when MY teacher is there so he gives input on a student's performance and how they can improve.
Posted by: harlan

Re: "Problem Children" - 01/24/08 10:34 AM

'I'd love to take weapons/train more/take the advanced class/etc. and I'll be there!'

LOL! Can't be the first time you've heard that. My teacher says that if he had a dollar for every time somebody said that they would be in class/show up...he would be rich. *shakes empty piggy-bank*

Do you charge for lessons/extra training?
Posted by: cxt

Re: "Problem Children" - 01/24/08 10:49 AM

So his excuse is that "he goes out on friday nights????????"

How lame---if he does not care about his training---then neither should you.

Guy needs to decide if he wants to party or train--his choice of course.

Speaks well of you that you do.....I just would no longer waste the effort on this guy.
Posted by: SNieves

Re: "Problem Children" - 01/24/08 11:19 AM

No, we do not charge more for the Saturday class. Since that "episode" I have opened it up for anyone to show up if they so desire.

Hasta.
Posted by: Itami

Re: "Problem Children" - 01/24/08 11:58 PM

Whenever I give free private lessons, I set it up like an appointment. I try to be professional as I can, I approach them about it and make sure they can come, I write it down in my planner while talking to them, and I give them an appointment card. If I think they might forget or decide not to come, I'll give them a friendly reminder the day before or leave a message saying I look forward to seeing them. Of the hundreds of private lessons I've given, I don't think I've ever had someone not show up without a good reason.

If this is an adult, then I think you took the right step. You opened that training time up for everyone, and if he really wants that extra training he can come whenever he wants. If this is a teenager in school, then I'd give them a little more leniency, we were all like that to some point. Just make it clear if you ever offer it again that this is a commitment of your time, too, and you'd rather spend it helping him than showing up for no reason.
Posted by: Itami

Re: "Problem Children" - 01/25/08 12:05 AM

Quote:

'I'd love to take weapons/train more/take the advanced class/etc. and I'll be there!'

LOL! Can't be the first time you've heard that. My teacher says that if he had a dollar for every time somebody said that they would be in class/show up...he would be rich. *shakes empty piggy-bank*



So true! My favorite is a weekly sparring training class. We get a lot for our weekly sparring class, but over the years we'll a large group wanting a class for working out to help their sparring. They all say they'll be there, so by the first class we expect 20+... and we're lucky to get 2.