Duck, Duck, Goose.

Members,
a few years back My family and I were visiting Grandma and Grandpa in suburban Chicago. Around many of the corporate ponds and public parks in recent years there has been an increase in the population of Canadian Geese. If the winters are mild enough they move no further south. For the most part the humans and the geese get along fine with the exception of mating and nesting when they get a bit territorial ( The geese that is). There are more and more run ins with humans these days. I was walking with my kids at a public park with a small lake. It had been overrun with geese. If you have ever seen how big a goose's dropping are you can imagine it can get quite messy. As we walk around the lake on the narrow paths occaisionally the larger birds would get territorial and spread their wings at us, waddle forward at us and let out a big HIISSSSSSSS to drive us away. So, we would move away if we could. At one point as I was holding my daughters hand a big male charged us. When I realised that he was not going to stop I positioned myself between the goose and my daughter,(and the I) threw a roundhouse kick that caught the goose flush on the side of the head. He dropped, then got up and made a sound like "heayoongk?". Then he turned and walked back to the ponds edge like a drunken sailor. My son said "He should have ducked".

Oldman -

Are you going for the Unified Species Middleweight Belt?

I saw the interview on ESPN later....the goose wants a rematch.

Poor goose, lucky he's still alive, considering the tiny head a goose has you might as well killed it.

Poor goose? He was trying to eat oldman's daughter!! And if he had died. . .well I know this great recipe. . .

waste not, want not.

ps-oldman, I think you need a comma in that sentence where you kicked the goose, almost looks like your daughter did.

Yeah, I had to read that sentence twice too.
And I didn't know there were such a big differences between gooses all over the world, gooses here are only maybe 2 feet tall, and don't eat people.

Last year in May I was with my company golfing at the Canmore Golf Course in Canmore, AB ( http://www.canmoregolf.net/ ). The geese are abundent here and on the last hole my group got up to there were about 20 or more of these suckers on the green and would not allow us to do our putting.

Now to put this in the right context you have to picture this hole. This hole can be seen from the club house very easy and their is a deck where most of my company was sitting waiting for the last groups to come in to start the BBQ. Of course being a company function we had drank a fair bit and I being the smart ass I am at times ... I tried to chase away the geese while swinging my putter over my head.

Geese crap ... seen ... slipped on it ... feet went above my head and I landed on my neck and shoulder blades. Everybody on my team and on the deck broke out in laughter and applause. It was hard to get up and if it wasn't for the alcohol I would have been in a lot of pain. All of my training on being tossed and falling right went right out the window. The worst part, I had to give a short presentation to our New Account Contest winners plus eat ... all the while with goose grap on my shorts and back.

That'll teach me ... IDIOT!

Need to brush up on your drunken forms, Dereck.

Those Canadian geese are freakin' annoying! They are everywhere there's water here. Crapping,hissing,and honking! I've had to swat one or two with my fishing pole.

I think the humane society need to check this out, this is animal cruelty...

I guess I had better not tell the story about the goat at the petting zoo.

Oldman, is it at all possible that that "Goose" has reincarnated as....you know who.

This gives me the goosepimples!

.....My idea on "Geesefied" reencarnation .....just....crapped

Darn it, if the police arrested you.....would you claim that the goose actually :
a) tried to eat your daughter
b) rape violation / sexual harassment
c) pillage
d) was under influence of drugs/alcohol
e) pregnancy hysteria
f) affected by stock market
g) I´d better stop saying stupidities because you will probably beat the crap out of me

LOL..... round house kicked a goose, now that's funny Oldman, did you kiai!!??

It was really just a love tap.

Does your bumper sticker say "Honk if you like roundhouse kicks" ?

http://www.econ.ucla.edu/doepke/spontax/pictures/rb/gans1.jpg

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So that's how the goose ended up, you kept that part quiet oldman